The Shakin' Martinis

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NYMPHOMANIAC - a man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more often than he does.

There is a knock on St. Peter’s door. He looks out and a man is standing there. St. Peter is about to begin his interview when the man disappears. A short time later there’s another knock. St. Peter gets the door, sees the same man, opens his mouth to speak, and the man disappears once again.
"Hey, are you playing games with me," says St. Peter.
"No!" the man’s distant voice replies anxiously. "They’re trying to resuscitate me."

The graveside service just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance...
The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.'